A bottle of self harm

A bottle
of self harm
to empty
till all’s calm

an injecting
of used pain
to spoon feed
the insane
rusty chains
Gutter link
Missing veins

Trapped inside
the bell tower
sheltering from
a bullet shower

lead stares
ping of the bell



the hanging shell

the decrepit monk
the clapper


i read death notices
in the morning paper
Like a battered foetus

the ensnarement
of fat love
self mutilation


there’s only
cartoon footprints
their pencil splints

i syphon
through a pencil
my morning coffee
which always taste bitter
after Β carbon toffee

a sonnet
of notes
i write
for the pianist
to smite

i never got
the parable tale
in frustration
i tug on my tail
deep within the towers bowel
i hear the tolling for the vestal
On a Hunch
That’s Back when I turned bestial

Β©bg 2010

39 thoughts on “A bottle of self harm

  1. Another jaw dropper. I also have a message today:

    We have 140 contributions to date, and I am trying again to rope in as many contributors to the Poets for Peace challenge (in place until this the end of August). The many voices in response to this have been fantastic, and I’d love you to add yours (again, if applicable) if you can. Feel free to use an existing piece of writing or a new one asking for peace and/or about the troubled times in which we live.

    If you are interested, please leave your poem in the comments section of Neha’s blog and it will be added. https://forgottenmeadows.wordpress.com/2016/07/16/calling-all-poetscreative-minds-to-a-grand-collaboration-poets-for-peace/comment-page-5/#comment-19287

    Thank you –
    Your voice matters.

    We are so grateful to be part of this community where poets and creative minds from around the world stand together uniting for PEACE! This collaboration is open till August 31st and we hope to see more of you join in!
    – Neha

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Passions intensely portrayed .The message is loud and clear.The senseless acts of the day put humanity to shame .There seems to be no recourse hence frustration intensifies .Beautiful expression and vent. Glad to share your sentiments.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Your imagery, as always, is absolutely brilliant. I can’t intelligently talk about it, unless I stop, read it through and really think about it. You do just kind of amaze me, bg!

    I’m going to go process that bottle (though I promise not to drink it), and try to come back with a coherent comment or two…just thought I would gush a bit of praise for you first.

    Liked by 1 person

    • lol well thanks Tanya. I very nearly hoisted my skulls and crossbones of old for this one as the bottle does contain poison………..but as long as u don’t drink 😊🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌

      Liked by 1 person

      • I won’t if U won’t…Lol (that sounds so childish)

        Speaking of skulls and crossbones, I am halfway through Long John Silver. Larsson (no typo monsters there) wrote a really compelling Silver, a character with an extraordinary will to live and yet no real purpose to his life. It is entertaining and fascinating.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Larsson is a gifted writer. Silver is compelling, especially his overwhelming drive for survival. I’m on the slave ship now. Larsson’s description is brutally stunning, and I can’t wait to see how Silver (now chained) gets out of it all.

        Is this a four banana or a five banana comment?…Lol

        Liked by 1 person

      • Yes as I read it I lived it, I could feel the dispear of the slaves but also my own anger as if I were watching chained unable to help, and of course I couldn’t. Ahhh it’s a book you can live in. 😊 I was just randomly throwing out bananas .hmmmm using it as a reward system, darn I wish I’d thought of that. 🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌 lol 😊


      • Well, that’s like a perfect ten bananas, unless we are using a scale of twelve or one hundred…Lol

        If you have never watched it, Michael Apted directed a movie a few years ago, Amazing Grace, that told the story of William Wilberforce’s fight in the UK to end the slave trade. Albert Finney, as John Newton, was really great in the film. The depiction of slave ship conditions is honest. Wilberforce is one of my great heroes.

        On Thursday, I’ll be posting about Native American issues in my own state, including a film where you will hear the term “timber nigger” and hear it’s abominable usage. Anyone who really wanted to know my heart need only read these things.

        I did manage to read myself off the slave ship; but, agreed, I am completely engrossed in the book. Of course, now I’m being sold into slavery on St. Thomas…GRRRRRRRRR

        I know you couldn’t hear it, but that was a 10 out of 10 banana growl…Lol

        Liked by 1 person

      • I have watched it. Twas a good movie.
        Looking forward to your next post.
        I heard the growl lol 🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌😊

        Liked by 1 person

      • Twas a good growl, more funny than scary though…Lol (You should see my “pirate”…oooh, arghhh, scallywag! My arghhh is award worthy but wtf is a scallywag anyway? Oh, I just looked it up…You know you are a writer when: scallywag = scalawag = n. a scamp; rascal. It’s Friday night, and I am looking up words in my dictionary FOR FUN…how pathetic). It’s your Saturday, though, isn’t it?

        My next post will actually be Monday. I attended my first live King Lear up the hill at APT last night. Twas awesome! I will be posting about that great adventure on Monday.

        I think I’m going to have a glass of wine (really should be rum) and continue with Silver (we are off the island now and back on water).

        Your banana endowment is extraordinary, btw…Lol

        Liked by 1 person

      • :)scallywags used to be quite a common expression I’d hear when I was growing up lol.
        Glad you enjoyed King Lear . Well his rum but your meant to wine and dine ,so since your feasting on the book….its allowed lol. 🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌😊

        Liked by 1 person

      • Ah, so my bg was a little scallywag as a lad…or maybe a big one (I’ve no idea how tall you are).

        I have height on the brain. I was asked today by a friend who writes in the horror genre to assist in a “hot” murder plot (completely out of my zone); but we ended up working out something with stiletto heels…Lol

        Out of that funny discussion, it was revealed that I am relatively tall but wear high heels frequently anyway, because I like to see over the heads of other people in a crowd. Yes, I like to look down on people…Lol (literally, not figuratively)

        Based on my assisting in the gory murder of some poor fictitious woman with her stiletto heel, I think I have earned a scallywag badge today…Lol (though I’d prefer a banana)

        Liked by 1 person

      • So u were an accessory to murder, I think that raises you above the scallywag line lol.
        I didn’t think I was a scallywag but adults like to name call lol hehe, well I was the tallest in my class, then I stopped short and the others kept going so I ended up average lol. I’ll give you a banana but don’t kill anyone with it lol 😊🍌

        Liked by 1 person

      • It is 1:15a.m., and this pianist, contrary to smiting your sonnet of notes, is again playing them out in her mind.

        Don’t blush for my saying, but your two left-footed dance is more graceful and enthralling than if you had a right.

        Perhaps your protagonist simply picked a poor pianist…(not bad alliteration for 1a.m…Lol)

        Liked by 1 person

      • Lol perhaps he did pick a poor pianist.😊🍌🍌🍌🍌🍌the limit of bananas is in no way a reflection on your comment, I just don’t want to overfeed the monkey 😊

        Liked by 1 person

      • I’m never going to be able to look at a banana without blushing again…Lol

        Banana cream pie?…out of the question.

        (I may end up with a second scallywag badge before the day is through)

        fyi, I did send you a second e-mail from that account. No need to respond to it…I just wanted to make sure you saw it.

        I’m heading out to dinner tonight and avoiding every single banana…Lol

        Liked by 1 person

      • Funny and true story: I was out to dinner tonight with my family, and my nephew started talking about a friend of his who collects guns. Without saying why, I asked about a 44 magnum gun. My brother, at the end of the table, launched into an enthusiastic and vivid description of the SIZE and the POWER of the gun, oh, and the BULLETS “cuz they are big too”; and my nephew pulled up pictures of that very large gun on his i-phone. This sent me into such a prolonged fit of giggles that I nearly fell off my chair and could barely finish my dinner. Fortunately, they all typically ignored me…Lol

        Honestly, I had trouble getting my blushing face through my banana-free dinner.

        I might just be pressing forward to scallywag badge #3. I’m going to go giggle my way through more “Long John”, as that does seem to be the theme for the evening.

        Liked by 1 person

      • As I giggle away my evening…

        Director: Action
        Me: Go ahead, make my day…snort, giggle, giggle, giggle…
        Director: Cut!!!

        I laugh far too easily to ever make it to that side of the camera…(ask my daughter who tries to take pictures of me for PR…Lol)

        Do directors actually ever say “cut”? or “action”?

        While you are at it, define “average” .44 magnana…

        “average” to an ant is like .5mm; “average” to an elephant is, what, 8 or 9 feet tall (don’t know, I never measured an elephant…I just know they like bananas).

        Back to Long John…


      • Regarding this piece, I hear echoes of a frustrated writer’s mind – the story that won’t write. Of course, this is you, so there are probably 3 or 4 other possibilities…Lol

        Still working on it.


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