Mr Bartender

i slides on upto the bar

i hails the bartender
like he’s a taxi
with his
sun brightish
yellow suit
and his
black rubberish boots

where are you heading tonight
says mr bartender

straight intwooos a bottle of rum
i slurish
i blurish

i starts
a knocking
back the bottle
i’m blessed with
by
mr bartender

shot after shot

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

i slurs

hey mr bartender
i’m
gonnaaaa hits
yous
yous
yous
yous
with
razooors and eraserrrrrs

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

i slursish

letus tell yous
my
Dionysus
behind the altar
which

naaah which
not witch
hehehe
who’s counting

AT which
mere mortals falter
by been
truly devoted

yous and meees knows
for
this here drunkard
sooo sooo
many of my lovers
have had
remedial tracks

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

damn it man

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

i tried i cried
i tried i tired
i got fried
chicken
to go
sooo sooo

hard

to save them
yet
my attempts
were
as pathetic
as any
zealots cosmetic
make over

YEAH YEAH

oh lordie lordie
yes
your present company
excluded
or
deluded
certainly not
included

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

hell
let’s face it
lets sale it
i did it all
at the
spectators ball
for i was
my egos thrall

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

don’t
you think
Dionysus
Gods
should know
their ego
tantrums
and
curse’s given
can’t be
insured for
geesuswizz

whaada crap
mooosic
yous playing

ahh wheres am i

yes yes
their
collateral damage
is
the only true evil
for
it is a cannibalism
it is a fatalism
it is a nihilism

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

anyways
Gods
are
Sods
they’re all bulimic
regurgitating
purgitating
a son
to
eclipse them
partially
or
totally

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

shucks

i need
to be
muthered
by
another
bottle of rum
mr bartender

thanks yous

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

kingdoms come
and
kingdoms go
gods
are such
capitalists
immoralists
they
tears thems downs
or
let thems drowns
even
the peasants
who
have the audacity
to dream
in
technicolor
have to pay perview
their
visions
their
decisions
with their
souls
enthrallment
resettlement
immortlement

oh lordie lordie
yes
your present company
excluded
or
deluded
certainly not
included

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

now that’ll
gets themmms
raised up
into their
desports
approval ratings
around
his
oval table
wheres 
wheresish
they’ll become hisssss turds
to be tossed
unceremoniously
discourteously
from
the top of God’s
ivory
dollhouse
with
arthurs sword
of
audacity
stuck
up their arse ‘s
a
flag attached
waving
behaving
in
a befouled breeze
as a signal
of hope
for change
but nope
twas
a
false pope
for
change

alls thus godshands have done 

oaaars spun
is
created
dictated
thuus
deranged
rearrangement
of
night and day
cause
the gods
are
all thesames

feral

once
they pull on the
onesiessuit
of
office

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

you knowessts
my Di on ysusss
i once
and briefly
was chiefly
advised
not
to drink alone
but
oh
i have found
the sound
of
loneliness
loves
my company
for
i am a hermit crab
inside
a
Genie’s bottle
sos nobodies
should
rub a dub
me up
the
wrong way

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

i says to ya all
luck it

just
pretend
life is real

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

i’m
such a lick arse diplomat
i don’t
mean to be

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

ahh where was i’s

yeah i’s hate desports
that send
messages across
this
flatish earth
in phallic symbols
TO KiLL

i’ll go
to them
i can beg
at the keg
of
Buddha

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

heysMistererrrBaaartender

howtheluckcome

i only remember i luves her
when i drink
at your
altar

HEY
i says
whaadda think
that guy
Pythagoras
at the
end
of the baaars net
is
looking rather
pink
around the gills

hey
says
do
you
THINK

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

that’s whys
i’m such
a bottle dweller
why
my
hell-li-copter propeller
causes
my wrists to suffer
so much
from
5 o’clock shadow

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

now meeeee
i’ll
always wear
this
blue burka
when I’m sober
and
can hear
my
ever so chic
heart watch
and
ticking time bomb
combo
counting
tickety tock
rickety tock
down
my beatings
LOUDLY

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

shhhh
come here
my con confident

this This THis THIs THIS

shhhhh
’tissss
my secret
so
yous better
die
knowing it

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

for
ten years
or
yous could says
for
a ton
of ears
to comprehend
the
weight
i’ve carried
that i married

i have loved 1

isn’t that
pitifool
even
biblical
definitely
a drinkable

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

wha….. whaada
yous
thinks her
name meant

haaaaaaaa
naaaaaaah

her
name means hope
yet all
i’ve been is her dope
and
that’s all i’ve been
all she’s ever seen
i am
a pathetic
Darwin specimen
in denial

a
crustacean
droped
on a rock
by a God
within
the bottle kosmos
left only with
two
simple claw hammers

a gift
from a god
no less
or blessed

given
to
bring the thunder
i guessing
whoos cares
they’re friggin
good at
removeing the caps
off
antique bottles of rum
sos i can
call
them
home
for awhile
to drag it with me
for
many a hilly
green Mile

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

i will never
go naked
before
neither
either
a parasitic king
or
a dogmatic guru
for
as a beast
i am
always clothed
in
O natural

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

i’ve
surveyed
the drunken devils
i
don’t bother
with
the angels

in fear
of retribution they lie
yeah
even the devine can die
in
ones memory

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

heres
to the child
of a god
i posthumously
once was
but
in the bowels
of
the colonised
i
became the TAPUA (monster)
that
knows
the end is coming soon
which
will be for gods a boon

sos
anyways
he stays
under
his
exoskeleton
crazy cracked
from
his Gods
lightning fingers
which
in his childhood
struck struck and strucked
always
more than once
shit
why never once

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

now
within the confines
of
his cave
he sings
his ancestors song
inhaling
from a lost
Genesis bong
before
a leaping , dancing
bonfire
built like a cross
to bind
his soul
within
his chitin ashes
for
eternity
but
his shadow
ends up
looking
as stupid as atlas
standing
upon
his mind
holding
up
his skull
from
caving in
on his world
that
loves hope

bang!
thud!
bang !
thud!

ehh
closing time
yous says
well
frack you frack you
mr bartender
cause
i knows another
place
with an altar
wheres
ones 
can worship at
24/7
i bids you a good crucifixion sir
i saaays
i bid you a good crucifixion sir

© bg 2011
author’s notes

some verses added or deleted for 2017